Harry Potter and Some Completely Random Thing
by Dryandra
Summary: Just something I came up with one night. Most people will be OoC, so if you don't like that sort of thing- You Have Been Warned. Not meant to be taken seriously, just a bit of fun. O.o


Harry Potter and Some Completely Random Thing That Has Nothing Whatsoever  
to Do With This Story.  
  
Well. Harry, our unreasonably angry central character has spent yet another boring, pointless summer at the Dursleys. But, it is almost September the first, and as you know, soon time for him to go back to the magical learning institution, Hogwarts.  
  
Note: I am going to skip the first part of the story, as nothing important ever happens here. However, if you really want to know: Harry is cut off from the wizarding world, as per bloody usual and feels terribly sorry for himself. He is ignored by the Dursleys (and not without reason, if you ask me. Since when has Harry ever said anything constructive to them? Or anyone else for that matter?) He manages to cadge a lift to Kings Cross, gets on the train, and finds a spare compartment with his two closest friends. He makes an absolute pig of himself on Pumpkin Pasties and arrives at Hogwarts in the evening. This is where the (cough) "fun" begins.  
  
Chapter Two  
  
Harry and his friends finally arrive at Hogsmeade Station after their boring trip on the Hogwarts Express. They make their way off the crowded train, and onto the cold platform. Huddling into their coats and scarves, they search for Hagrid. (ahem. Should it not be cloaks?? Stupid movie producer.) "Where the bloody hell is that great tall oaf?" demanded Harry. "Probably at the pub, downing a couple of Firewhiskies, useless alcy that he is." muttered Ron. "You two! If you would just READ Hogwarts: A History, you would know. oh, sorry that has nothing to do with this, does it?" asked Hermione, slightly embarrassed. Ron and Harry stared and pointed, laughing cruelly behind their hands. Hermiones' eyes filled with tears, and she rushed off. "My God! What a loser!" sniggered Harry. "Yeah I know!! Ever since Viktor Krum dumped her Pansy Parkinson she's been acting really weird !" smirked Ron viciously, just loud enough for the sobbing girl to hear. Hermione burst into fresh howls, and was whipped away by Moaning Myrtle, who was muttering into the girls ear such things as: "Now you know what it feels like to be miserable, you whinging little cow" and "Ha ha, in your face!" Shrugging, Harry and Ron turned away, only to find Draco Malfoy and his cronies right in front of them. "Watcha got there, Potter?" spat Malfoy, his voice full of venom. "Uh, it's called a wand, ya wanker" retorted Harry. "Don't get smart with me, Potter, or I may be forced to bring up the point that your parents are dead, which is my standard reply when I can't think of a good comeback." Malfoy shot back, fists clenched. "Clear off, you losers" said Ron angrily "What are you going to do, Weasley?" drawled Malfoy "Curse me?" "Well, as a matter of fact. Cruc.!" Malfoy screamed and hid under Goyles' robes, whimpering. "Thought that'd do it" Ron smirked. "Come on, lets go before someone sees us, it will mar our, I mean MY heroic image!" Harry said, patting his hair and looking smug. He and Ron strode along the platform, towards the carriages that would take them to Hogwarts.  
  
Twenty minutes later, Harry and Ron sat down in the Great Hall for the beginning of year Feast. "I can't wait to start eating! I'm starved" grinned Harry. "I completely agree with you." Sir Nicholas said.  
  
Harry stared. "But you can't eat anything. You're a ghost!" "Oh, rub it in, why don't you! Dash a man's dreams. Why, why must you be so cruel?" Sir Nick howled, crying noisily into a napkin. "Yes!! Two in one day! Hooray!" Harry cheered, as the ghost wept noisy tears. The ghost shot Harry a filthy look, and swirled away from the tables, disappearing into the rough stone walls of the Great Hall. "What's wrong with him?" Harry asked irritably. "Beats me." said Ron unhelpfully, through a mouthful of potato. "I mean, say something completely obvious and people get all offended. You'd think that by the way he acted he didn't realize he was a ghost! Jeez, talk about pig ignorant." Harry fumed. "Oo y aely car aout wa e fiks?" Ron said, trying to talk through an enormous bite of shepherds' pie. (Hideous table manners. Hideous) "Eh?" Ron swallowed. " I said, do you really care what he thinks?" Ron repeated. "Well, no. But it's the-" Harry was cut off by an enormous crash that came from the teachers table. Everyone in the Great Hall stared at what seemed to be.  
  
(can't think of anything amusing right now. need chocolate and/or something else REALLY sugary).. Neways, pls R&R.  
  
Thnx, emma ;-) 


End file.
